Illustration: Maria Contreras Aravena
The commercial opens in a modern-day Wild West. We are at Thee Stallion Saloon. A lone tumbleweed drifts past the gleaming motorcycles and glimmering neon signs outside. Honoring the saloon’s cinematic position as a locus of camaraderie and conflict, the ad follows a familiar script. Our hero — the saloon’s namesake — sits inside among her crew, an orange, bejeweled cowboy hat tipped over her face to create a momentary sense of mystery.
Suddenly, an Afroed woman bursts into the bar, panicked. “Someone stole your Hottie Sauce!” She pauses. “All of it.” Our hero instantly snaps into action. “Not my Hottie Sauce!” Megan Thee Stallion responds, rising from her seat, filled with purpose. She fires up the bike, and she’s off.
Chasing the thief from Houston to New Orleans, Stallion’s semi-animated motorcycle pursuit ends in a reveal: The thief is none other than Megan’s icy alter ego Tina Snow, whose plan is quickly foiled by the “real” Megan. To ensure the sauce’s safekeeping, Megan hands it to a Popeyes chef. “The Hottie Sauce is here,” she announces under a Popeyes sign that’s as orange as her hat, sticking out her tongue with a final signature “ahh!”